Sunday, December 1, 2013

I just want to say something brief about GaGa...

The Lady during her creative and cultural peak in November of 2009
From an outsider’s perspective (a.k.a. MINE), it looks as though Gaga is allegedly drugged up all the time - shaky, facially bloated, and unfocused (IMO). Contrary to how she was from about 2008 to 2010, Gaga seems completely unaware of how people perceive her. People can defend the Lady all they want, and she does indeed deserve much praise for pop-cultural domination so great, it hasn’t existed since the days of Michael and Madonna. Furthermore, her stellar work for the LGBT community should not go unnoticed, and to that, I say, “thank you, Gaga.” However, something is clearly off when one parts ways so publicly with so many:
  1.  Troy Carter, management
  2. Perez Hilton, pop-cultural blogger
  3. Nicole Formichetti, stylist and designer
  4. Laurieann Gibson, choreographer
  5. Rob Fusari, record producer

This look: Breakfast at Tiffany's in '80s Paris
Upon first arriving onto the scene, she really understood what she was doing. Gaga GOT it. The preeminent pop-cultural theme was twittering messy starlets with long blonde hair a la Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, and Lindsay Lohan (a part-time blonde). Gaga fused this look with the advent of modern computer technology, pairing light-up sunglasses with a pleather leotard and gloved concoction most gay men dream of wearing. She was so on point that Beyoncé’s Sasha Fierce and Rihanna’s Rated R personae seemed completely derived from the ‘60s princess/‘80s drag queen Gaga had brought to life. She truly was a walking, breathing Warholian portrait, hair bow and all.

When one analyzes people who have so deeply penetrated the pop-cultural landscape for so long, one should know how these types operate. I can’t say with certainty, but I’m almost positive that Madonna and Warhol, upon realizing their ambitions, recognized that they could not touch drugs if they wanted to have the stamina and levelheadedness necessary to grow into long-term pop icons. I believe both took much inspiration from the trips and highs of those around them, but they realized that in order to capitalize on creativity, they needed to be clear-minded enough to mean business. You can’t be in a haze and run your company successfully for three decades. Even the most functioning of addicts would eventually collapse.

This brings me to the Born This Way album and look. The songs were so incredibly
This look: MESS
overproduced that all the layers jumbled together into plain old noise, with lots of loud, unnecessary rock guitars. The aesthetic, composed of this weird blonde and black hair combo, was a total mess. The only person who can pull off skunk hair is Daphne Guinness, point blank period.

We all hoped that Gaga would redeem herself with Artpop, but honestly, where are the SONGS? Most of the tracks sound like exactly that, DJ beats upon which Gaga sprinkles some singing. Where are the great melodies? This girl can write a killer chorus – have you heard Aura? It’s the rest of the song that sounds like an Arabian Western nightmare. Yes, I’m talking to you, Infected Mushroom. You snobby idiots don’t want to be associated with Gaga? You should be so lucky. Go make some good music.

Anyway, Gaga, I used to say, “Well, at least she’s doing what she wants, completely unadulterated,” but even I don't believe myself anymore. If you were sober (assuming that you’re allegedly not), you would hear this pile of poo you’re making.

Peace out.



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